Tag Archives: life

All you need is Love (and possibly a sense of humor too)

12 Feb

Isn’t life just insanely busy right now? I feel like that’s the vibe on the street and among my friends and family. People are enjoying this mild winter we’ve been having and it feels like there is just so much to do as spring gets closer and closer. I’m excited! I love being busy, but I’m working on taking the time to relax and enjoy life when I find those rare moments of stillness in my schedule. I’m going to talk about LOVE now, for two reasons, 1) I had an AMAZING experience at my church’s Beatles Eucharist Sunday service and I’m feeling inspired, and 2) That dreaded Hallmark holiday is upon us, Valentine’s Day!!

Honestly, I don’t think there is anything better than love. And I’m not just talking about love between you and your partner, but also family love, the love you have for your children, your friends, your pets, your neighbor, your country, the poor, the rich, and of course your love-hate-love for Kim Kardashian. If I may be so bold, I would say that LOVE is my motto for life. I don’t always live this way but it is my goal. A few things such as my short temper, my OCD tendencies, my inability to handle change, and my need for control are all hindrances to this end but alas, I do the best I can.

I’m sort of addicted to LOVE. I constantly ask the Scottish how much he loves me or what his favorite part about me is, why, you ask? Because I’m a needy freak. My little Becca has told me before that she doesn’t love me anymore because I’ve made her angry for some reason, and she knows I’m sensitive to hearing that. Kids are wicked smart, they are. And way back when, while growing up in Minnesota, my mom was pondering the idea of fostering a child at our house and I selfishly responded with something about how will she love all of us enough and that I don’t want to share my mom anymore than I already have to. Maybe I have some weird thing about being the oldest child and feeling abandoned as the second and third kids came along. Maybe I just crave being the center of attention? And maybe I’m just a huge romantic who loves to be adored. This is getting out of hand…

OK, back to my life motto of LOVE. While I probably spend too much energy attempting to receive love, I also try to share love as much as possible. To me, being a loving person is easy. I like to give hugs. I thoroughly enjoy hearing people’s stories, and when someone talks to me I always strive to be non-judgmental and understanding. I love to cry and will cry because of you, for you, or with you. (To me, tears are not a sign of weakness, but simply a human reaction to both good and bad things.) I laugh… a lot. I think laughing is so close to loving because it means you are happy and feeling joyful. And joy = love. Spending time with people is loving them, attending their shows, going to their parties, dancing at their birthdays, eating meals with them, and everything else in between shows them you care. I really enjoy meeting new people too, which I know for most, can be a big fear. But I just love the idea of new possibilities and potential. It’s endings that frighten me. And being a good friend is a way to love someone. I joke about being self-centered quite a lot, but I do put other people first quite often.

Last year, I made the mistake of telling the Scottish I had no real need to celebrate this dumb holiday coming up, but then was shocked and appalled when he got me nothing! I guess I was a bit unclear… off the record, I actually LOVE receiving chocolates, romantic cards, flowers, balloons, jewelry, and other gifts on Valentine’s Day, but let the record show that I think it’s a stupid waste of money.

Doesn’t this make everything clear now? My obsession with weddings is not just about a white dress and a fabulous party, it’s about the celebration of two people and their love for each other. It’s the stunning performative quality of a wedding that is so beautiful. I hope the traditional wedding ceremony lives on forever! And my love of LOVE is directly related to romantic comedies too, even the most contrived love story is still fun to watch.

Go tell someone you love them. Someone you haven’t said it to in a while. And go listen to the Beatles.

With LOVE,
Stephanie

Quote: “Love is the only gold.” Lord Tennyson

End of Year Check-in 2011

21 Dec

Hallelujah! This year is almost over. Can I get an amen?? A-MEN. Why am I so pumped you ask? Well, to begin with I sort of despise odd numbers in general. I like things organized and calm, and odd-numbered years cause me unneeded angst. Then there was the whole back surgery of March 2011 and the subsequent bills, debt, and harassing money issues that followed me through the summer, so, I would say I am ready for 2012 for many reasons. Plus, I already have so many exciting things set in motion for 2012. I can’t wait to start a new part-time job doing transcription work with a theatre company here in Chicago in January. I’m going to go to New York City to visit some amazing friends in February, I’m standing up as MOH in my friend’s fabulous April wedding, and once August 2012 hits, I can officially make my condo an income property and move in with my man… ring pending.

But this year wasn’t all bad, and I would say I have matured a lot in the past 12 months. This is my recap and check-in with myself (and with you):

Pain/back surgery started my year off and it was unlike anything else I’d ever experienced.
Quitting a show (due to pain/back surgery) for the first time brought me to a new depth of sadness I hadn’t known and some apathy for how I look at my art.
Traveling to the United Kingdom with my family was magical. Despite the fact that all five of us were stuck in a tiny room together we had an amazing time sight-seeing through England with my sister as our guide. And watching my parents meet my boyfriend’s parents in Scotland was a blessing and a memory I’ll never forget.
Fighting insurance company and hospitals over bills was soul-killing and the ugliest thing I’ve had to do in my life thus far.
The Scottish finding an apartment for “us” made me so happy and gave me a glimpse into my future.
Spending Labor Day weekend in North Dakota with my grandparents for their 75th and 80th birthdays filled me with joy and gratefulness at the family they’ve created.
Random ailments like a weird stress rash and pink-eye made life frustrating and humbling.
Celebrating four years with my nanny family reminded me how much life can change in a short time, and how the important people are always there for you.
Hosting my first Thanksgiving with the Scottish and friends made me feel all-grown up and ready for my own family.
And Christmas, well Christmas hasn’t come yet, and I don’t know how it will go except that visiting my old stomping grounds, my lovely family and fabulous friends means I’ll have a fantastic week.

That said, this is my last blog post of 2011. I’m taking a week and a half off to relax and enjoy the holidays. I figured my boss gave me a week off, so my other boss (being me) should follow in kind. I aim to begin posting again on Sunday the 1st!

Blog ideas you can look forward to coming in 2012:
I’m discussing joining Weight Watchers, and so far people are encouraging. But I’m still waiting to hear the phrase, “What? You don’t need to go on Weight Watchers!”
Virginity. How does society views virgins and waiting for marriage, mixed with what I deem positive things that come from waiting.* Should be pretty dope. As in cool, not referencing the drug.

*As always, my goal surrounding discussions of heavy topics is to help people understand them a little more, even if that lifestyle or choice is not for you, at least you can find something to appreciate in it. Less judgement, more compassion. I’ve either found my new motto, or my first book title… not sure yet.

Join me in the New Year and Happy Holidays readers!!! as they sign off in the UK:
XOXO,
Stephanie

Quote: “Year’s end is neither an end nor a beginning but a going on, with all the wisdom that experience can instill in us.” Hal Borland

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