Tag Archives: Proposal

Here’s hoping my babies come out with a Scottish accent

9 May

This is a relationship blog and there is a relationship I have yet to discuss on here that I’d like to talk about. I would like to discuss my feelings about children, specifically my own. Please do not freak out, no one is pregnant. Well no one is pregnant who is writing this blog. But someone (me) is planning a wedding and starting to nest, and feeling excited about the notion of having little ones in her future. When I look lovingly into the Scottish’s eyes and tell him I want to have his babies, the fear in the room is almost palpable. He gazes back at me and in an unsteady voice, says, “Not for a long time hunny.” OH NO. IT’S LIKE THE PROPOSAL ALL OVER AGAIN. This wonderful man I’m going to marry moves slower than any human being I know. He doesn’t do anything quick or rash, all moves must be calculated and planned years and years in advance. Meanwhile my biological clock ticking and the noise is really starting to bug me. My clock sort of revved up after getting engaged and while it starts off trying to be nice, it usually ends up yelling at me. My clock: “Umm excuse me, umm, your body was made to procreate, and umm, well, all of us here in this pale vessel would like to say, GIVE US SOMETHING TO NURTURE *GOD DAMNIT!” Of course it’s fitting that my biological clock is overly dramatic like myself.

 

 

I’ve decided the best way to explain my feelings on having children would be to fill out the Who, What, Where, Why, When and How Many of it all. Sort of like an English paper outline. Enjoy!

So, WHO? Well, if possible I’d like to have a Scottish-American kid, with an ideal mix being 60% Scottish and 40% American, because those Scots just eat whatever they want and don’t worry about a thing, plus they are the most laid-back culture I’ve ever been around! As long as the kiddos get some of my passion, drive, and at least one artistic quality, we’ll be all set. If for some reason I need to adopt (ps I think adoption is awesome) then I think an African-American boy and an Asian girl would be adorable.

WHAT? Human children please.

WHERE? This is a great question. I would like to have my kids live in Chicago because it’s kind of my favorite city of all time, but I would also like to be near my family when I raise my kids. So either Chicago or Minnesota… at this point I’m not sure the Scottish could fathom moving to an even colder climate, but the lure of free babysitting has to hold some weight, right? Ultimately, I will have my kids in the Midwest. Ain’t no better place for kid-raising the way I see it.

WHY? This is an even better question. Besides just the biological clock, I most simply want a family of my very own to dream, love, and grow with. I love my family, immediate, extended, and honorary, and I want to create my own little unit with new special traditions and memories. I want to put more awesome people in the world. People who will respect the earth and their fellow human beings, people who will not discriminate based on sexuality or race or physical condition, and people who add to the quality of life for those around them. So, you know, just to have a little mini-me walking around… just kidding, I’d kill her.

WHEN? Let’s just say if I found out I was preggers by our first anniversary in March 2014, I would not be upset! Although, I have to say, it’d be nice to have more than a year to worry about Number One (me), and as a nanny I get an insight into the raising of kids and since it really is life-changing there is no need to rush. On the other hand, I’m super excited and not sure how long I’ll be able to wait! I’m hoping the Scottish isn’t having a heart attack on the train right now as he reads this on his way home. His ideal is like years from now after we have a house and enough money saved up to send them all to Harvard. AS IF!

HOW MANY? I say 2-3 and the Scottish says 1-2. But I want to have two girls (sisterly love is the best and the worst all at the same time) and I also want to have a little boy, so three kids would be nice. But a family of four sits together so well on theme park rides and airplanes, plus one more kid = one more flight to Scotland, and we know those trips are gonna add up!! But on the other hand, I come from a family of three, and so does my mom

Two things I know for sure, I don’t want to have an only child, and I don’t want to have three boys. If we have two boys and start trying for a third, I’ll probably spend our life savings flying around the globe looking for the best method to ensure our next kid is a female. Cause at that point I’ll be the desperate mother of two boys and I’ll most likely already have a reputation of being crazy.

Overall, I will consider us blessed no matter what the gender, number, or Scottish-American mix our children have, but frankly that doesn’t make for a very fun blog post.  For the ladies out there, when did your clock start ticking?!?!?!  Or maybe it hasn’t, that’s OK too!!

* I do not take the Lord’s name in vain when speaking but I take a lot of liberties when writing and it just sounded better to say GOD DAMNIT than GOSH DAMNIT. Luckily for me, God has a sense of humor.

Quote: “There are no seven wonders of the world in the eyes of a child. There are seven million.” Walt Streightiff

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He loves me, he loves me not, he proposed aka he loves me!

11 Mar

Dorky title I know, but what can I say? I’m feeling dorky. And I’m feeling psyched. And I have to get the words out on paper. Every once in awhile it just hits me, the Scottish really wants to marry me! How cool is that?!?!

I think a little bit of back story is necessary. My man is wonderful in general but a romantic he is not. And that’s totally fine with me. He’s a man’s man (albeit a skinny one) but he likes beer and football and he’s not a sissy. He’s adventurous, always up for a challenge, he knows computers, plays video games, prefers me in low-cut tops, and drinks whiskey straight. He’s a total guy.

I love him for everything that he is and while dating, I knew that he loved me, unconditionally, I knew that he wanted to be with me FOREVER, and I knew that his heart and my heart were stuck together (because I, on the other hand, AM a romantic) but my guy’s guy did not really want to talk about marriage as quickly as I did. It stressed him out and forced him to think about responsibility, growing up, and above all, lifelong commitment (AHHHH!)!! So, for awhile there I was the one saying COME ON, I JUST WANNA GET MARRIED, and he was the one saying, whoa let’s date for like two or three years first and get to know each other more. UGH.

It didn’t help that I was and still am surrounded by women with uber-romantic men in their lives. I have a handful of women that met their current partner and the GUY was the first one to talk about marriage. I found myself comparing and wondering why Mr. Scottish wasn’t acting the same, super-romantic way that they were acting. But I’d remind myself that I like him the way he is and every man is different. I love all the things that make him a man’s man, so why would I want to change that? Plus, he DOES buy me flowers on Valentine’s Day and it might have taken him almost two years to purchase a piece of jewelery (beautiful Swarovski crystal earrings) but that’s OK because he outdid himself when it came to my stunning engagement ring. wowza.

Since I’ve been engaged I’ve been walking around (on my little cloud) exclaiming sometimes to myself and sometimes out loud, The Scottish wants to marry ME! What.an.honor. I feel like the luckiest girl in the world because my man’s man decided it was time to settle down and be someday’s husband. And being engaged looks very good on him. He smiles when I call him my fiancé and he somewhat enjoys the wedding planning process and is definitely being very helpful thus far.

So I know there are lots of men out there in touch with their sensitive side and those that show more emotion and romance, but it is an indescribable feeling you feel when the person you love asks you to marry them. (Especially when it puts him so far out of his comfort zone that he would never do it if he didn’t feel it 100 percent.)

I NEED QUOTES.

This is the story of how I thought I might get engaged this weekend and then it really happened.

22 Feb

If this is your first time reading my blog and you don’t know how crazy I am, or if you just want a refresher, click HERE to read all about my desire to get hitched. And now for the story…

The Scottish was very VERY aware of the fact that I wanted to have my family nearby after the proposal. If you’ll remember back to Christmas and the drama of how he “missed” the perfect opportunity, it would make sense that he would seize this past weekend when my Mother and Father were visiting us here in Chicago. I know it sounds sort of weird, why wouldn’t I want to be alone with The Scottish at such a special time? Well, why do I blog about my inner-most thoughts? Why do I like to be in front of people? Why do I share private details of my life with complete strangers? All of these are great questions. The answer is, I love people, and my good news is your good news and vice-versa. I wanted to be able to hug my mom afterwards and luckily I got to do just that!

So all day on Saturday after picking up my parents from Midway Airport, I was going back and forth wondering if this would be the day. It ended up being the day we stood in line for over three hours to see the top of Willis Tower and to walk out over the famous “ledge;” compared to when my sister and SBF (sister’s boyfriend) were here and it took us 15 minutes, it felt like quite the wait! I heard later that the Scottish said to my Dad, “I’d like to marry your daughter,” while we were at the top overlooking the city. My Dad, true to form answered with a fist pump in the air to show his excitement. Later that night, he passed the good news on to my Mom and her next step was to quiz my Scottish to make sure he was marrying me because he wanted to and not because I was forcing him into it like some wedding-Nazi. He confirmed what I already knew and told her this was something he really wanted to do (he bought the ring while I was in NYC a few weeks ago visiting friends). Awww! Then they thought up the terrible brilliant plan of my Dad pretending he wanted to see the top of Trump Tower the next day after church since we hadn’t made plans for the afternoon yet.

So on our way to church the very next morning my Dad suggests this idea (while I’m thinking to myself this is what the Scottish really wants to do) and my Mom agrees to it, solidifying my suspicions. I mean, my Dad NEVER gets to make decisions, and there is no way my mom was going to let him decide our next step, especially after we’d already been to the top of the Willis Tower the day before. This is when I started to get nervous. And not only that, but my mother decides that morning to “practice” with the video camera, another tell-tale sign of what’s to come… and she asks me what I’m going to do that day. I thought briefly about being a smart-ass and saying, “I’m going to get engaged today,” but then decided against that because it wouldn’t have been fair to my wonderful and nervous Scottish.

That afternoon, my Dad and the Scottish go back to the apartment to find that *Gasp* the Trump Tower bar or whatever is closed due to it being off-season. He then finds that most of his ideal spots are closed for that same reason and starts to panick. Eventually, they tell my mom that they will meet us at the John Hanock Building at 3 PM. Of course, it makes no sense for us to wait in more lines to go back to the top of yet another tall building to see yet another view UNLESS it is so the Scottish can propose.

Meanwhile, I’m shopping with my Mother and having to use the bathroom every 30 minutes to umm you know, poop, because I’m soooo nervous. Finally, we meet up with them and take the elevator to the Signature Lounge, essentially the Wine and Cocktail bar, of the John Hanock. We find a table and order drinks. I hold his hand under the table and squeeze it multiple times to let him know I love him. I later hear that the Scottish gives my mom a look of “I can’t do this in front of so many people!!!” She blatantly discreetly takes my camera from me and then heads over to the window to check out the view. I debate going to the bathroom or not before deciding to follow her to the window.

And then…. The Scottish comes up behind me, puts his hand on the small of my back and at that moment I entered what I like to call, the haze, the cloud, the shock… and I have yet to come out of it. He tells me he loves me and that he wants to continue loving me for the rest of his life. He gets down on one knee, opens the ring box, and says, “Will you marry me?”

Then I say weird things like, “Ohmigosh, I can’t believe it, and thank you!” All before saying “YES YES.” We hug and kiss, my Mom starts to get teary-eyed, and we take more pictures. My parents are literally beaming, the Scottish is shaking, and I’m dumb-founded by the fact that I’m not crying. I’m just floating in happiness but I’m not crying the tears of joy I had anticipated.

Then we check the camera only to find my Mom completely missed the entire thing and has literally two seconds of my boobs on video so we make a sort of reenactment right there by the windows and even though it’s not the real thing I’m excited to have that memory on film.

The Scottish explained that had all these words in his head but they went out the door as soon as he opened his mouth to talk. My Dad said that people all over the bar were watching us and while I was slightly disappointed in the lack of clapping, it was unreal to be proposed to in such a public way.

Afterwards we began the phone calls and stared at the stunning beauty of my ring. The picture I posted does it no justice, I am just as bad as my Mother at using a camera so I plan to get professional engagement shots done and at that point there will be some good pictures of my beautiful princess cut diamond in all it’s sparkly glory.

I know that my friends were worried I’d be disappointed if it wasn’t the grand gesture that I had built up in my head, but my engagement story is perfect, even in its non-perfection. My fiance did a FANTASTIC job and just because I knew it was coming does not make it any less special. Life works out the way it’s supposed to and I wasn’t meant to get engaged at the top of Trump Tower. The John Hanock, on the other hand, is the place he took me for dinner the first time we celebrated my birthday together. It’s place I go with my nanny kids all the time, and the Signature Lounge is one of my favorite spots in the whole city to take out-of-town guests. And now, when I take someone up to the 96th floor, I can walk over to the window that I got engaged in front of and relive the moment all over again.

I can’t even begin to describe how good it feels to be engaged. The Scottish and I are more in love than ever and we are both so excited to begin this journey together. I feel at ease and at peace. I am enamored by my ring (and hoping that all the scary nightmares I was having will stop now that I have it). Both of our families are overjoyed and supportive; we couldn’t ask for more. In the one day of planning and talking about a season and a city location my Mom has been absolutely amazing. I know she is going to be the biggest help ever.

I will keep you all posted on when reality sinks in and it hits me that my dream is coming true. And now I just want time to slow down, I want everything to go slowly, and I want to enjoy every second. This was the story of my engagement, thanks for reading.

Quote: “You know you’re in love when you can’t fall asleep because reality is finally better than your dreams.” Dr. Seuss

note: Currently in the market for good wedding blog recommendations, specifically ones that deal with marrying someone who is NOT a US citizen, weddings set in Minnesota, and Scottish wedding traditions. I have not started looking yet, but would love to hear about your favorite wedding blogs!

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